It feels like writing a traveller's diary. How it feels to be away from home, to be far away from the family that is so dear to me, friends that I can count on and place that I am familiar with. I know it has been almost 2 years studying away from home (going back every half a year though), but it does not mean that I am immune to that.
Yesterday as I was scrolling through Instagram, saw a dear friend wrote this: 'I rly am horrible at letting ppl go...'. I feel I can relate to it. I have been easily attached to people around, people that have deeply impacted my life, people that are precious in my life. I admit I have the fear of people leaving or perhaps me leaving them.
Same goes to my family. As I was planning with my siblings on what to do and where to go on Mother's Day, I was struck as there's so little I can do. I can't be physically there with my mum. I teared. I admit that I have been really bust to even post a card back, or buy something online for my mum, but I just feel that nothing beats being by her side.
As I called my mum yesterday, after wishing her, I cried, I could not hold back any more. I can feel that she too is very sad and close to tears at the other side of the phone. How I wish I can be back there to celebrate Mothers' Day with her, celebrate her birthday with her and also other occasions with the family. There is just so much that I wish to, only if I am with them...physically.
I don't mind being labelled as one that misses home, reliable and dependent. I don't feel the need to hide my feeling of missing home. I just can't wait to go back home to celebrate each occasion with them.
Just to say, another person will be leaving my life in a month's time. Ain't easy.
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